Olympic Fakery

Painted Walls Hide The Unseemlier Parts Of Beijing.


Jun, 2008

There’s been a lot of news in the past two days about the various enhancements the Beijing Olympic organizers have employed to spruce up the games. For example, during the opening ceremonies they put on a cuter girl to lip-sync a song recorded by the plainer-looking original singer. The organizers also added digital effects to the supposedly live television broadcast of the fireworks. 

And here’s the latest breaking news:

Olympic Medals Revealed to be Fakes

Medal winners in the 2008 Beijing Olympics were disappointed to learn that the medals were in fact chocolate coins, a popular confectionary in China.

"We were running over budget," said the organizers, "and we thought this was a great opportunity to inject more Chinese culture into the Games as chocolate coins are a traditional lucky giveaway during our Lunar New Year celebrations."

Medal winners in gymnastics, who had hitherto been watching their weights, upon hearing this news, promptly unwrapped and ate their medals.

"Hey, I was hungry," said one gold medalist.

Remember, you read it here first.

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